Your efforts to be the best possible parent for your neurodivergent kid is taking a toll on you.
Some of my clients talk about how much they love their kids and at the same time wish that parenting didn’t have to be so hard. You do all you can to support your children, and when the day ends you feel like you’ve been run over by an emotional & mental tornado. You are loving warriors who strive to support your kids in systems that weren’t built for them, and you’re exhausted. Your exhaustion is impairing your ability to show up for yourself, your kids, your relationship.
In work with my clients, I am always holding that your children are perfectly who they are meant to be, while acknowledging that parenting them can be a challenge.
Before reaching out, you may be wondering if what you’re feeling is bad enough to need help. You don’t have to be in crisis to deserve support.
What I know is this doesn’t have to be your baseline. You don’t have to keep quietly struggling.
Hi, I’m Jen.
I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Washington, and work with parents of kids who are autistic, ADHD, PDA, have learning differences or other neurodivergence. Navigating systems that don’t fit your neurodivergent kids, kids who need constant co-regulation, and forgetting who you are other than a parent, can be exhausting and frustrating.
If this is your experience, I get it.
Have you found yourself saying, “I don’t know who I am anymore.” You miss your old self, who spent time with friends or felt empowered to chase your own dreams, and feel overwhelmed by the new identities thrust upon you — sensory need detective, master co-regulator, dyslexia researcher extraordinaire — It’s hard to put yourself first.
It feels like no matter how many books you’ve read or how many podcasts you’ve listened to, you’re still not consistently parenting the way you want to.
You are making SACRIFICES —You’d make the same choice every time and the sacrifice still sucks — Missing your yoga class, reading books about Autism or Dyslexia vs. the new Lucy Foley novel you’ve had your eye on.
In a co-parenting situation, sometimes one of the you feels more worried than the other. One of you feels more responsible to make sure the kids are getting the most out of OT or executive functioning coaching, or that the kids social skills are growing, but no masking is happening.
Being a caregiver at this level may evoke memories of your own experience as a child, especially for parents who are late-diagnosed or suspect they may be neurodivergent, and you could have some grief about that.
If this is you, let’s talk.
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